Game of Phones: Manufacturers as GOT families

Winter may or may not be coming, but the latest Game of Thrones season certainly is almost here. We’ve had a bit of a laugh imagining the Game of Thrones houses as smartphone manufacturers.

House Lannister: Apple

LannisterThis one just seemed to be a no brainer. With no shortage of cash and lawsuits against Samsung, the Lannister family motto suits Apple to a tee – “Apple always pays its debts”. The similarities don’t stop there, with both Apple and the Lannister’s being determined to destroy their main rivals at all costs.

House Stark: Blackberry

Both the Starks and Blackberry were once the very best of the best, but have now fallen from grace. Touchscreens destroyed the Qwerty way of life known to Blackberry users while the Lannisters destroyed the Starks. There are now only a few of both remaining, and desperately seeking some sort of power-given marriage.

House Baratheon: Android flagships

The two of these go hand in hand. The Sony’s, Samsung’s and HTC’s of this world just fit so perfectly with the Baratheon boys Robert, Stannis and Renly.  Robert the wily old King usurped the previous regime and after a somewhat partnership in the earlier days with the Lannisters aka Apple, the relationship turned sour.

While the main fight to this day between the Houses remains against the Lannisters, the family are clearly not safe from themselves while the brothers and manufacturers battle each other and risk it all to become the one true ruler. Samsung versus HTC and Stannis versus Renly spring to mind.

House Targaryen: Windows flagships

windows_10_mobileAlthough not quite ready at the moment for a big shoot out, Windows like the Targaryens’s are remembered for being one of the biggest hitters of the past. Everyone fears will eventually get it right and come to dominance once more.  Probably the most photogenic of the lot and with some cool tricks up their sleeves, assets like dragons or epic 40MP cameras provide these twins the potential to retake the crown in the future.

The Night’s Watch: Android entry level

Night's_watchThe battle in the North is becoming more and more relevant as the years go on. So to is the battle of the discount handsets, with Alcatel, Motorola and other becoming even more relevant in recent times. The bigger companies are getting in on the game with the likes of Samsung and Sony making budget handsets in order to capture more of the crowd. Like the Night’s Watch the budget smartphone industry is the motley crew of the phone landscape with every manufacturer under the sun creating a budget smartphone to fill a gap in the market.

The Night’s Watch is the last defence of the realm a group made from mercenaries, criminals and outcasts, and Jon Snow. With this in mind we believe the budget Android group most consistently aligns them as without these starter models the big guns wouldn’t have the chance to entice an audience into parting with their hard earned cash on their more expensive models.

White Walkers: Emerging Asian smartphone manufacturers

The biggest threat to life as we known it are coming out of China. The likes of Huawei and ZTE are stuffing epic hardware into ever cheaper handsets. Much like the White Walkers, this new handsets are gaining ground in new lands, matching up to seasoned veterans. The Night’s Watch best keep an eye on these guys, as they will stop at nothing.

Giants: Symbian

They’re extinct.

So that’s all folks. Season 6 will be kicking off tonight at 9pm on Sky Atlantic. Did we get it right, or would you have changed some things?

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Junior Editor and host of the Goosed Podcast, Jon is passionate about phones, design and everything tech. Having joined the team in 2015 he now leads the entire Goosed podcast channel. Ask him about 3D printing or Disney movies. Read more by Jon.

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